On Getting Here and Going On
First of all, I have lived the experience “It’s uncommon to have a message, without having a mess first.” So if you’ve got a mess, you’re not alone.
I am a wounded healer.
I’m the survivor of divorce, chronic pain, job loss, relationship loss, ministry loss, PTSD. I’ve lost my integrity and rebuilt it.
I’ve been so depressed I wished I didn’t have to live anymore, and have found joy, and even love, again.
I’ve survived all these situations and even thrived, through God’s grace in providing me with skills & wisdom gathered from Scripture and other books, counselors, friends, pastors, positive psychologists, leadership experts, mentors, coaches, apps, and anything else that I could absorb, so I could feel better myself, and be equipped to help others feel better too. I’ve used my “brave” muscle a lot, and I’ve leaned on my tribe when my “perseverance” muscle was fatigued. I know the value of NOT trying to go it alone.
(That’s why I’m so glad you are here.)
Curious how I got here, leading a coaching group?
I’m a recovering perfectionist, who believes it is possible to focus on growth while accepting that I am perfectly imperfect. My story has been marked by successes and challenges that make me empathetic to others and root for their success. I’ve seen God’s grace break into impossible situations and change them in an instant, and I’ve seen Him allow great heartache too. I am a natural optimist- who sees the best in others. (When I lost my optimism during a “perfect storm” of life circumstances, I rebuilt it through reading “Learned Optimism” by Dr. Marty Seligman.)
I’ve had the blessing of hundreds of hours of coaching from Master Trainers at Dale Carnegie, thousands of hours of experience in front of groups, myriad opportunities to work all over the US with business leaders, and have pursued certification in the trauma healing modality that made all this possible. I’ve even stood on the TEDx stage to talk about that healing modality, Somatic Experiencing.
It’s been a long journey, marked by times of challenge, and other times of fast growth and transformation. A key has been to remember, for better or for worse, it won’t always be this way. I’ve built a practice of gratitude that helps me appreciate the times of growth or ease, and now they are a resource that can sustain me as growth or achievement seem elusive.
“Never, never give up.”
Easier said than done, but those words by Winston Churchill, ring in my mind and remind me that I need (and we all need) lots of resources to bouy us at times when we feel underwater, so we don’t give up. In fact, the photo at the top of this blog, was taken in January 2023, is one of my resources. It was taken at the end of a three-day training meeting I had designed and executed. The C-suite was so happy with the meeting, they hoisted me onto their shoulders for this picture before we left for the closing dinner of the week. I don’t work there anymore, but the photo is a wonderful reminder of enjoying the feeling of success.
Who are your resources? Those people who remind you of your strengths and why you are working toward your goals.
What are the things you love to do that allow you enjoy a state of flow? And how often are you doing them?
How are you using your gifts to serve the world, or even your nextdoor neighbor? You ARE gifted and the world needs your gifts, and you WILL experience meaning when you are using those gifts in service of others.
How are you connecting with your creator? Though all the strategies above show measurable improvements in how people rate their level of “flourishing” in life, we believe there is a God who loves you, imperfect as you are, and wants to engage with you. Come as you are. Join us in the process of exploring your life and your potential, and closing the gap between what is, and what is possible. Talk to you soon.